One day Daowu, accompanied by his disciple Jianyuan went to visit a family in which a funeral was to take place, in order to express sympathy. Jianyuan touched the coffin and said, “Tell me, please, is this life or is this death?” Daowu said, “I don’t say life; I don’t say death.”
Blue Cliff Record 55
On February 5th, 2022 I put up an entry after learning earlier in the week that one of our teachers, a flawed but influential person, and a Buddhist by his own account, had passed. Since then we’ve learned, grown, shrank, grown again, changed, along with my own understanding of the past. I felt that entry also deserved to change.
Daowu won’t say life and won’t say death.
On death, life and self, from the Sayings of Buddha (Peter Pauper Press,1957):
Some say that the self endures after death, some say it perishes. Both are wrong…(pg. 10) … as the sun’s power through a burning-glass causes fire to appear, so through the cognizance born of sense and object, the mind originates and with it the ego, the thought of self…. The shoot springs from the seed; the seed is not the shoot; both are not one and the same, but successive phases in a continuous growth. (pg. 11)
….
Life is instantaneous and living is dying. Just as the chariot wheel in rolling rolls only at one point of the tire, and in resting rests at one point; in the same way, the life of a living being lasts only for the period of one thought. (pg. 16)
Sayings of Buddha,
This old translation, presumably the words of Buddha, came into English through a winding path, according to the book’s introduction. Here’s the explanation: “The narrative of [Buddha’s] life has as its principal source the Sanskrit stories of the monk Asvaghosha, which were translated into Chinese in 420 A.D. and from Chinese into English by Samuel Beale in the Eighteenth Century. The present text is derived chiefly from The Gospel of Buddha, a compilation by Paul Carus from many source-books of Buddhist teachings, including Beale.” (Forward 1,2)
So here we have the words of a legendary teacher (Buddha), as recorded by another legendary poet and teacher (Asvaghosha), translated into the Chinese by an unnamed person–likely also a teacher, possibly someone like the Bodhidharma–and these texts are translated into English by another teacher and scholar, Beale. If you Google “the Sayings of Buddha,” interestingly enough, the author is listed simply as Buddha.
Who knows who said what with a history like that? And yet, the teachings of Buddha are found in many cultures and have been translated many times over. These teachings and philosophies form a kind of conversation between generations and cultures. So if you read Daowu’s words next to those of the Buddha, you can see how the one teacher has influenced the other.
And the Blue Cliff Record, which presumably records Daowu’s words and actions, is itself, a bedrock of Zen Buddhism. What about it? Another torturous history. Legendary teacher, Bodhidharma, is credited with bringing Chan Buddhism, the precursor or Zen, from India to China. Some trace his lineage to Buddha. Well and good. According to the Wikipedia page, the Blue Cliff Record is derived from lectures on Buddhism written by a monk, Yuanwu Keqin, an adherent of Chan Buddhism. He collected and wrote koans to instruct students during summer retreats between 1111 and 1117 in Hunan. Yuanwu used as his source another collection of koans collected by the poet Xuedou Chongxian . Their words together made up the Blue Cliff Record.
According to legend, Yuanwu’s successor, Dahui Zonggao, became convinced that the work led too many students astray, so he burned it, or rather, burned the blocks used to create copies and several copies.
So the Blue Cliff Record was seemingly lost or in pieces, until it was later reconstituted by Zhang Mingyuan. His actions were controversial: his child’s illness was interpreted as a bad omen, given his endeavor to revive the Blue Cliff Record (same Wikipedian entry). However, with some encouragement, he persisted.
Dogen Zenji, the founder of the Soto School of Zen, is credited with bringing the reconstituted Blue Cliff Record from China to Japan. (also Wikipedia, linked.)
We deal with sacred texts like we deal with memories: we return again and again to them, sometimes fighting them, sometimes lovingly treasuring them, sometimes erasing them, sometimes reconstituting them. For better or worse, sacred texts are the words of the past reaching into our present.
Training outside in a park can be a big relief after practicing in a small indoors space. Also, teaching a kata is a great way to improve your own mastery of it!
Get Vaccinated!
Most of the adults who teach or participate in the board meetings for our small karate club have gotten vaccinated. My husband and I went for our second doses on Tuesday. By Wednesday, we were both definitely feeling that second vaccine! Today, I’m almost two days past my vaccination and feeling much better.
Our older teenagers have been able to receive vaccinations as well. Several of our members are under sixteen, and have not been able to receive vaccines. We’re still continuing our classes over Zoom and meeting on occasion in a park, where we observe social distancing. We have not been able to resume kumite or other close contact activities. If you’re lucky enough to have multiple family members who practice karate, then those close-contact activities are an option.
Training in the Park on Saturday!
Last Saturday, Senpai B, our sixteen year old Nidan, and Sensei T led class. For a change, my oldest, F, was able to take a break from school work long enough to join the class. S, who normally looks forward to attending, had stayed up late to turn in a project, and slept in.
Sensei T led the group in a warm-up that involved running in a circle, doing side-shuffles. He also had us reverse these by turning to the inside or the outside of the circle. During kihon, Sensei T also introduced moving drills. For example, during kicks, we’d step forward for mawashi geris or yoko geris, then reverse and go back.
It was so nice to be able to have space for these exercises! Many of us have been practicing over Zoom in the living room or in a bedroom, and dealing with a lack of space. Kicking forward and backwards in a park felt like freedom!
We reviewed several kata, including Kanku. Senpai B covered both some basic and advanced kata, and also took requests. We even went briefly over Kanku. At one point, when Sensei R was teaching it, I had gotten pretty good. However, my more recent lack of practice has caught up with me!
After reviewing kata, we practiced Bo Sono Ichi and Bo Sono Ni. That was a lot of fun. Also, giving every student a bo staff makes it very easy to measure out space for social distancing!
What’s the best way to solidify a kata in your head? Teach it!
I did, however, teach Saifa over Zoom. The last time Sensei T had had us do a kata walk, I realized I was weak in Saifa and needed much more practice. I committed to teaching it over Zoom, which required me to practice it several times beforehand, and pay attention to the smaller details.
To teach this kata, I setup two “cameras,” a laptop facing me from the front, and an iPhone set further back from the side. I had the monitor do a “split screen” between these two over Zoom so students could see what I was doing from both the front and the side. I also “screen-shared” so we could watch a couple videos of the kata.
YouTube, of course, is my friend where this is concerned, and I found two great videos:
I also love this Sensei’s rendition of the kata, posted by Kyokushin Cape Town:
One thing I’ve started to do when teaching over Zoom: I have the class watch the two videos then talk about the differences. For me, one of the biggest differences between the two Senseis is their head motions. The Sensei in the first video looks forward until he snaps his elbow into hiji ate. At that point, he snaps his head forward. The Cape Town Sensei appears to be keeping his eyes on his “opponent” the entire time, so he looks forward even when his body is turned to the side. Both present different challenges, and it’s interesting to try each one and see how it feels!
It will be a while, however, before I’d attempt to teach Kanku!
Quick Video Notes
Oh, quick note on Kyokushin katas on-line: recently I found a good-quality posting that contains several of the kata videos we often look for, as well as a page of credits, listing the instructors, the katas and even who created the music. I’d like to post it for reference:
Two of our junior shodans taught our last two Zoom karate classes, and each of them were quite challenging. Senpai K started off class normal enough, with stretches, kihon conducted at a good pace, followed by a water break. He had us review pinan sono yon a few times.
Next, a devious idea came to Senpai’s mind: he asked the monitor to set a timer, and had us run part of the kata, then freeze and hold that stance as long as we could. The first pose was a zenkutsu dachi, and the entire class held this for five minutes. Senpai K then had us stop.
Kiba Pain
Senpai K had us go into kiba dachi, or “horse stance.” Kiba is a thigh-burner and more of a challenge than zenkutsu dachi. Senpai K let us sail right past that five minute mark. I thought he said we would stop at six minutes, but I misunderstood. When the monitor called six minutes, my legs were already shaking. I came up to shake them out, but I was the only one!
Everyone else, including Senpai K, continued to hold the kiba stance. After a minute or so break, I went back into the stance and held it with the group. In total, everyone, except for me, held that kiba stance for ten minutes! Some of the students, like our newest green belt and one of our brown belts, kept their arms out in fists the whole time, while others, Sensei T among them, practiced punching or other strikes to keep it interesting.
Kata Challenge Saturday
Senpai N, my son’s good friend, taught class yesterday morning. First, she started with a vigorous kihon of ten exercises, but went “straight through.” This means that she calls the stance and the first exercise, but we move straight through all the exercises done in that particular stance. For example, when she calls “migi sanchin dachi,” this is the stance we get into during kihon for punches. So once we get into that stance, we understand that we should run all the punches: seiken chudan tsuki, jodan tsuki, ago uki, uraken shomen uchi, etc. She led kihon at a fast clip, except when a rat pulled her attention away a time or two. She was instructing with a computer setup in her own back yard and had a wild visitor or two.
Kihon Improvements
Sensei T reminded us to watch our hikate hands, the side you keep “in guard” while the other hand does the technique. He also spoke some about how you may keep your guard differently depending on your situation. During a street fight, for example, you will want to keep your face guarded, so you may keep your hands higher than you would in normal kihon for some techniques.
Speaking of kihon, I often do a quick google search to check my spelling of the Japanese terms, etc. While doing so, I found a couple very cool videos. So first, a video about the first and most basic block we learn: chudan uke. This video is created by One Minute Bunkai:
I love the fact that he begins with the most straight-forward demonstration of the technique and its use, then develops it to show a wide variety of uses. Note that it can be an attack as well as a block.
Next, I found this: it’s a video showing demonstrations of many basic Kyokushin moves for kihon. Several of the folks in the videos are well-known karateka in Kyokushin:
Kata Recall
Senpai N wanted us to complete kihon quickly so we could have plenty of time for the next item on her agenda: kata. Before the water break, she asked class members to come up with a kata to do. We should choose the kata we feel we know best. My son and I brainstormed, and I felt I should be able to do any of the kata I’ve learned, with the exception of Kanku. I really need to practice that. We landed on Tensho, and decided to do it together. We did fine, but I realized I needed to work on some of the finer parts. And speaking of Tensho, check this out. This video is shared by Kasımpaşa Budokai-Do:
Yes! That is Sosai Masutatsu Oyama himself, our style’s founder. Watching him, I know my son and I have more practicing to do. I also love the smoke on the stage–Oyama was such a showman on top of being an incredible karate teacher.
We had a special treat for Saturday morning’s karate class: Sensei B, a teacher who has studied Nin Jitsu, taught us self-defense moves. Over Zoom, he has been teaching for us roughly once a month. Granted, teaching self-defense over Zoom is no easy feat, but he makes it fun. We normally attend class with partners.
He started with a technique used to defend against a punch that was basically a joint attack. You catch the punch, step into your opponent, come down on their bicep with your forearm while pushing the fist forward to make your opponent’s elbow bend. And you step behind their leg/knee to trip them. While your opponent is off balance, bring your elbow to their face. This set of moves was more complex and took a while for us to get properly. Also, my son and I had a small debate about whether this was the first move or if I’ve confused it with the second, so if he is correct, my memory may not be accurate.
Sensei B watched each pair over Zoom and coached us through the techniques. Usually after some coaching, most of us were able to perform it adequately.
Breaking a Choke Hold
The next one was more straight-forward. In both, you are breaking a choke-hold. In the first, you grasp your attacker’s right hand with your left, twist the hand off you and push it towards your attacker while striking with your right hand. Twisting the hand while pushing the hand/wrist towards the attacker can force that person to the ground, since he or she will naturally try to prevent damage to their elbow.
My son and I practiced this technique on each other during class, and you really feel it (ouch!) when the other person gets it right. Sensei B had us do the techniques very slowly so we would not hurt each other. That one, which involved the hand/wrist twist to control an attacker through the arm, was very straight-forward.
The last one involves breaking a chokehold by raising your arms straight above your head, pinching the attacker’s hands between your shoulders, then bringing your arms down on their elbows. Sensei B taught us to go from the outside of the attacker’s arms, but while practicing, S and I found it works pretty well from the inside, too.
Do these Fancy Moves Really Work? A Self-Defense Spoof
The internet is a great resource, so I did a few searches to see if I could find a demonstration of some move similar to the ones Sensei PB taught us. On my post from December 14th on self-defense, I posted some useful videos.
I also found a pretty funny, but also disturbing, video of a self-defense spoof. A young man in a white gi runs around, ostensibly to demonstrate self-defense techniques, but actually demonstrates their antithesis. He starts by approaching another young man, most likely a friend, then describes him as an attacker. His “attackers” half-heartedly comply, or just watch him with a clueless expression. He usually refers to them as “drug dealers” or “muggers.” He begins with a defensive move likely modeled on a legitimate one. Then he pulls a gun out of his gi and “subdues” his opponent with the gun. I think I chuckled at the first one–but also found it disturbing. His “opponents” looked like ordinary kids, which added to the humor. It was an effective spoof.
That raises a question: does self-defense really work? That depends on the situation as well as your skills. Defending yourself is better than not, even in the face of a weapon. If you believe your life is in danger, understand that compliance with an attacker is no more likely to insure your survival than fighting back. People who fight back tend to fare better. Fighting back, even if you fail, will certainly feel better later if you survive.
Basic Self-Defense
Long before I started studying karate, I took a self-defense class aimed at survivors on the advice of a therapist. Attending this class were women who had survived sexual assault and violence as adults, as children or both. While the classes’s particular focus was on survivors, many of its principles are generally useful. These ideas can be useful for men as well as women and children. We are not accustomed to thinking of men as victims. However, men and boys are also vulnerable. When they are victims, they are often overlooked and misunderstood. In high school, a close male friend of mine was a sexual assault survivor. Just as we know from the “Me, too” movement that many survivors do not talk about their experiences, this applies to male as well as female victims. All victims deserve support, understanding and care.
These principles, I hope, will be useful everyone. Yes, many are simply common sense. However, our sense of propriety or a desire to avoid conflict will sometimes make us ignore what is right in front of our eyes. Sensei R. always says the most important part of self-defense is to recognize and accept you are in a fight.
Six Simple Common-sense Principles of Self-Defense
I still find these rules from my first practical self-defense class useful. These are also useful for martial artists, but you do not need to know karate to observe these.
Avoidance is the Best Defense
Pay attention to your surroundings, particularly when you are alone in a public place. Notice where other people are and whether or not they see you or pay attention to you. Notice if anyone is behaving erratically. Steer clear of erratic persons or people paying undue attention to you or others. Alter your course if you need to.
Be cognizant of your personal space and preserve it. A person asking you for directions does not need to come near you. If a stranger approaches you, order him to stay back. Do so loudly. If he doesn’t respond appropriately, take evasive action: move back, run, get in your car, cross the street, go into a building, etc. A person who really just wants directions will stop and ask you from a distance.
Recognize when you’re in a fight, and respond appropriately
If you fear an attack, use your voice. Be loud: “Stay back! Get back! Go away! Leave me alone!” Yell to bring attention to the situation. In my class, the instructor suggested we yell “Fire!” and not “Help!” Her logic: people run away when they hear a scream for help, but will run to the source when they hear “Fire!” This was in the mid-90’s in Michigan, so that might not hold in fire country, i.e. Southern California. Whatever you yell, yell it loudly. You want to call attention to your situation.
If you are attacked, fight back. Recognize there is no “fair fight” with an anonymous assailant. Your assailant has already taken an unfair advantage by choosing this time and place to attack you. Use every means at your disposal to defend yourself: go after the attacker’s eyes, throat, genitals, knees, feet. Remember joints are often used for take-downs, so attack theirs. Also: often perpetrators want easy victims. If you put up a fight, they may move on to look for an easier target. Keep fighting: your life may depend upon it.
Keys, cellphones, a purse or bag, your shoes, a car door–any of these can be used as a weapon.
Listen to your gut: each of us is born with an instinct to survive. Your unconscious, animal brain will access your surroundings and your situation much faster than your reasoning brain. Follow your instincts; they can save your life. I recommend great book on this: Gavin de Becker‘s “The Gift of Fear.“
What about using my Smart Phone to record a potential attacker?
Once, in a public parking lot with a friend, we were approached by a man who believed we’d “stolen” his parking space. He yelled insults at my friend and was headed straight for us. It was broad daylight in a covered garage in Los Angeles.
My friend whipped out her cellphone and start recording. She made it clear she was recording him. “So you want to tell this to a judge or a police officer?” He continued to curse for another minute or two, but did back off and leave. Recording with a cell can be a good deterrent if you have the time and space to make the attacker aware you are recording his actions. You can also dial 911. However, placing your attention on your phone removes it from your surroundings and your assailant; this could give him an opening to reach you. In my friend’s case, I was next to her and could act. It’s a judgement call, particularly if you are alone.
Conclusion: Preserving Your Life is the Objective
Finally, no simple set of rules will apply to every situation. Listen to your own instincts. If you are attacked and survive, seek help afterwards. Get medical attention if you need it, and therapy, too. Survival–not winning–not avoiding the loss of dignity or property–is most important. These others may be restored later.
After Sensei B’s class, I did a bit of reading on Nin Jitsu and its relationship to historical ninjas. On a website called Way of Ninja, I found an interview with Eric Shahan, who has translated many historical Japanese works on martial arts and warriors. Regarding self-defense, I found one of Shahan’s quotes regarding the ninja particularly relevant. According to Shahan, a shinobi’s (or ninja’s) use of martial arts differed primarily in the goal:
“The main difference there is that your priority is to get away, not to defeat the opponent.”
According to the Way of Ninja site, ancient ninja were primarily spies and less often assassins. Therefore, surviving to share the information they’d acquired was paramount.
If you ever find yourself in the unfortunate position of needing to use your self-defense lessons, remember your goal: living. Like the ninja of old, you must survive in order to share your knowledge.
So at the beginning of February, I was thinking about how karate had helped me with my professional life. Of course, it’s fun to have a cool hobby to discuss with your coworkers. Karate certainly fits that bill.
However, on a philosophical level, my karate practice has aided me in more fundamental ways. I work in visual effects. As an industry, visual effects is basically the intersection between the technology sector and the film industry. Neither of these have a reputation for being easy for women to navigate. In fact, during my twenty year career, I’ve never worked for a female visual effects supervisor. They exist: I’ve seen or met three. Of the three, only one worked on a large projects with lots of 3d animation. The other two worked primarily on smaller, indie films with less computer graphics.
Once, at Dreamworks, I worked on a film with a female director. The vibe with a female at the head of the picture was a bit different, but not terribly different. For those of us for whom it is rare to see a woman in a position of leadership, she was an inspiration. She was also an Asian woman–so for persons of color, particularly Asian women, it was cool to see her at the helm. When we see ourselves in another who has achieved a great success, it reminds us of what is possible. She did a great job, too!
Work Life is Competitive
Fitting In and Standing Out
Male friends have told me it’s not easy for them to succeed, either. At least as a minority, you stand out. People remember you because you are a rarity. My male friends feel like wall flowers. Our industry also employs folks from all over the world. Coworkers from other countries experience difficulties, too. Often English is not their first language; this adds communication and cultural barriers for them. Many of us have reasons to feel like we don’t fit at work. Gender, race, nationality, religious expression, sexual orientation or identity, heritage, age, physical or mental abilities, education level and emotional challenges–this is not a complete list. Often, the things that make us unique can also make us stick out, for better or worse. The inverse is also true: fitting in too well can make us feel invisible.
Relocating, Long Hours: Understanding Your Problems Aren’t Unique
Moreover, visual effects is highly competitive. We often work long hours. More recently, folks were expected to relocate for jobs, sometimes to different countries. This has the effect of reducing the number of older people in the industry: once you’ve bought a house or had children, moving to another state or country is much more complicated. Interestingly enough, with the pandemic making it possible for more of us to work from home, that may changed. I certainly hope it will.
Visual effects, however, is not unique. Many industries ask employees to relocate, and feel competitive for workers. I was surprised, but not really, to read about how much pressure workers experience in warehouses run by Amazon. Not long ago, the LA Times ran an article about how shoppers and drivers for services like Instacart feel squeezed by both employers and the customers utilizing those services. My sister is a child therapist. About a year ago, her company converted her and others to contractors. During any given week, she doesn’t know if she will work forty hours or less. She and others like her have lost their benefits, like health insurance or paid vacation.
Working for a living, for the majority of us, is not easy.
How Can Karate Help?
How can karate help? Certainly, it provides exercise. It emphasizes both strength training and cardiovascular fitness. Keeping your body fit is a major advantage, and a fit body helps promote a healthy brain with balanced emotions. That said, I find karate’s philosophical underpinnings helpful, too. Here are lessons I learned from karate which help me in the workplace.
1. Remember to Kiai!
What is the most important part of the kiai? That it be heard! When we practice kihon, break boards or perform some particularly difficult feat, we kiai. Kiais have a twofold purpose: to focus your attention, and bring the attention of others to what you are doing.
First, a kiai is a “spirit call.” You can use it to focus your energy towards the task at hand. You give a shout, channeling your all into what you are doing at that moment. We are trained to kiai the second our hands or feet slice through objects. This forceful shout gives us a singular focus and helps us channel all of our mental and physical energy into a particular goal, be it a blow to a brick or a punch to a formidable opponent.
The kiai also teaches us to claim our space and make our voices heard. This is particularly important for white belts. Newer students are often shy. They try not to bring attention to themselves. The kiai quickly teaches them to let this shyness go. The kiai announces to the rest of the dojo that these students are here, making a focused effort, and pay attention to them!
This is helpful in the workplace, too. Speak up about what you do. Claim your space at work; tell others what you are working on. Certainly let them know when you’ve accomplished a feat or reached a milestone. Let your voice be heard! This, too, is a kiai.
2. Follow Truth
For Kyokushin, “truth” is in the name of our style. In the dojo, we seek to find that truth: the truth of our own strengths and limitations, the truth that these are not fixed points, but rather marks influenced by diligent effort.
In order to improve ourselves, we must also be honest with ourselves, and each other, about where we are right now. The entire kyu-rank structure helps us mark progress by setting attainable goals. In order to advance to the next level, you learn certain kata and syllabus, do a fixed number of exercises and fight a certain number of rounds. Each kyu rank increases in difficulty, but the student, too, becomes stronger, tougher and more capable.
Part of the pursuit of truth, then, is being honest regarding your own capabilities and progress. You do this by performing tests, and submitting your skills to the assessment of others. As an advanced student, you may help judge others. You must also practice on your own, and assess your own skills. How many push-ups can I do on my toes and fists? Am I maintaining what I need for my rank? If I want to advance, how many do I need to do for my next rank? The goal of these assessments, both those we give to ourselves and to others, is this: help individuals improve.
Objectivity and Benchmarks
Note what is happening here: we agree upon objective benchmarks. For example, performing five of the pinans and yantsu correctly, sparring for six two-minute rounds, and doing sixty push-ups, sit-ups and squats, along with learning the fourth kyu syllabus are the requirements for a green belt in our style. When we hold a promotion, candidates know the requirements. They perform these as tests in the presence of others. During promotions, we demonstrate whether or not we can meet the benchmark for a particular rank. In short, we attempt to find objective measurements for progress.
You can do this in the workplace, too. Push for clearly defined, attainable goals. Encourage coworkers to do the same. Offer objective assessments couched in encouragement to others. Make self-improvement your goal and help others to improve themselves, too!
3. Defend Yourself
We hope that, most of the time, the workplace is a friendly, encouraging space where everyone is able to do their best. Often, though, this isn’t the case. Self-defense is one of the pillars of karate. Since truth is important to us, we recognize that the world can be a dangerous place. Sometimes others are intent on doing harm.
“Self-defense… begins with the belief that you are worth defending.” Our karate club’s publicity wonk texted this quote from the Jiu-jitsu master Rorian Gracie just last week along the link to a Zoom karate class. This sense of self-worth is fundamental to karate: your own life, health, well-being and improvement must be of great importance to you–or there might not be a you!
Sensei R. often tells us this: when you are attacked, the first thing you must recognize is that you in a fight. At that moment, the fight is your current reality and you need to deal with it appropriately. Often, people will not see the evidence before their own eyes and will choose to pretend everything is okay when it is not. Sometimes they mistakenly believe that if they simply act normal, life will go back to normal. This is denial, and it’s dangerous. Karate teaches us not to seek conflict, but it does gives us tools for dealing with conflict when it finds us. If you’re in a fight, fight back with everything you have: your skills, smarts, strength and spirit: kiai, kick and punch!
Appropriate Defense at Work
In the workplace, I hope, a physical altercation would be less likely. If you feel you are under attack, first assess the nature of the attack. If you are engaged in a fair battle of ideas, defend your ideas! Also listen to the defense of others’ ideas. Relax: sparring over the best approach or the best solution to a problem is a good thing, and can make you stronger regardless of who actually wins. Look for benchmarks or objective criteria in order to find the truth. Let objectivity bring you and your coworkers to the best solution. Enjoy the kumite match!
If you feel a coworker is questioning your judgement, state clearly your beliefs and list evidence for them. Also state your qualifications for making those judgements. Sometimes your coworkers may not be aware of your background and qualifications. They may not know why you made certain decisions. So tell them clearly. If you hear your work being scrutinized, listen to criticism, but analyze what is actually being said. What benchmarks or objective criteria are at play? Did you know about these criteria beforehand? If not, point this out. Do any of the criticisms have merit? If so, you have an opportunity to make improvements. Own these. If not, propose objective criteria.
In short, answer criticisms. Engage your critics. Defend your work. Do not let fear interfere with your self-confidence. Finally, remember we all have room for improvement.
4. Own Your Rank
Karate teaches us to own our rank. As white belts, we listen, observe and imitate. White belts bring enthusiasm to karate. Likewise junior employees or interns in a company offer enthusiasm and a fresh perspective, but they are also expected to listen and learn. Advanced karate students will ask the Sensei about finer details of karate; they help instruct less advanced students. If you are a senior employee or someone with a lot of experience, that’s your job: mentor those younger and less experienced coworkers, pay attention to the finer points that you know to look for, and point these out. Accept the responsibility that comes with your level of experience.
Time is Money: Respect it
As a woman working in an area with fewer women, I often find myself in a situation in which people assume that I know less than I do, or that I have less experience than I do. I’m short, too, and sometimes people unconsciously associate being young (inexperienced) with being small. Before I studied karate, I would listen politely in my desire to be considerate, convinced the other person is simply trying to be helpful. I might let someone explain a procedure to me that I actually understood well. After studying karate, I do not do this. I recognize reality: the company’s money is at stake. Survival for a company depends upon judicious use of money. My time is the company’s money. His time is, too. I politely interrupt now.
In a dojo, it’s easy to own your rank. We don our belts and line up by rank. It’s clear who is a shodan and who is a mu-kyu. At the office, it isn’t clear. You may have to tell someone what your position is. It doesn’t make you a jerk. On the contrary, it means you respect that other person’s time as well as your own.
Life is Short
Karate encourages us to live in the here and now. Meditation, breathing exercises, kumite: all of these teach us to be present in the moment. Take that awareness to work with you, then bring it back home. Recognize that, if you are fortunate, you will live long enough to see changes at work, at home, in yourself and in others. Some of these changes will be good ones and others will not. Be patient with others and yourself. Empathize. When you are home, let go of work and be at home. Seek peace.
Guest instructor SenseI AJ taught Saturday morning’s class with a focus on building balance, strength and mental resilience.
Saturday, our guest Sensei AJ returned with more challenging exercises, this time focusing on the legs. She started out by having us do warm-ups focused on helping us loosen up: circling the hips, knees, head, swinging our arms, etc.
Following the warm-up, we started with swinging-turns, where we allow our arms to dangle and move as we turn. The focus is on keeping the upper body loose and coordinated with what the lower body is doing. Next, we did “step-ups,” where we practiced stepping up on our toes as we raised one knee, with the focus on attaining more height.
Leg Exercises: Balance and Strength
Finally, she brought us to the challenging exercise. Each of us fetched a chair or positioned ourselves against a wall, if we could. She demonstrated on a chair. My son and I also brought kitchen chairs into the living room. Lately, we’ve been opting to setup for Zoom karate indoors, in our living room. Using the back of a chair for support in front of you, you bend forward and kick. The goal is to make your shoulder, hip, leg and foot go out in a straight line. Also, you hold out the oi-zuki arm straight, too, with your hand in a fist. So your fist and arm are parallel to your leg. To practice proper chambering, you first bring your leg up with your knee bent, then extend the leg.
Sounds simple enough, but then Sensei AJ made the exercise more challenging: you keep your leg up, to practice balance, and retract the leg back to the chamber position. You do all this while balancing on one foot with your fist still out. In this position, you kick and return to the chamber position ten times without dropping that leg. Then we switched sides and did that set of exercises on the other leg.
Once we finished the exercises, I could really feel it in my hips and lower back muscles. My son felt it, too.
Spin Kick Goal, Belt-Stretches for Wind-down
Finally, our instructor went over a spinning kick that all of these exercises were building towards. Many of us practicing over Zoom did not have sufficient space for this, though my son and I attempted it in our living room. Sensei T and his family, who have a rather large dance studio for practicing, could perform the spinning kick. It was cool to see him demonstrate what we are building towards.
At the end of class, she had us stretch with belts. We looped our belts around our extended legs and feet to add some extra pressure to deepen the stretch. You put your belt round the center of your foot, extend your leg, then use the weight of your arms to pull the foot towards you. In this position, we stretch the legs, one at a time, from an upright position, then lay on our sides, leg out in front, still holding the belts, and twist our bodies to the opposite side to stretch out our lower backs and hips.
Hanging Between Disasters: a Buddhist Tale
I’ll end where Sensei AJ began: she opened class with a thoughtful re-telling of an old Buddhist story. A fierce tiger chases a monk through the forest, and the monk, trying to save his life, climbs into a deep well.
Too late, he sees a poisonous snake at the bottom of the well. Luckily, he grabs a hold of a protruding root, extending from the well wall, on the way down. The tiger prowls at the top of the well, ready to eat him. The poisonous snake, swimming in the water below, is ready to bite him.
Trapped, the monk hangs on for dear life between these two types of death. Then he realizes that mice are chewing through the root, so very soon, he could fall to his death in the waters below. Things look grim to the monk, but he is patient.
Sweetness and Change
Above the well, a tree towers, sheltering a bee hive directly above the well. Honey, dripping from the beehive, lands on the monk’s face. He licks the sweet honey, grateful to be alive and experience the wonderful taste of that honey. Buddhism, after all, has taught him to appreciate life’s sweetness.
Also, Buddhism teaches that everything changes. Though his situation feels hopeless, he waits. The impatient tiger jumps into the well, falls past the monk and lands on the poisonous snake below. The monk manages to shimmy back up the well and climbs out. Sensei AJ then reminded us that, though this pandemic has lasted a long time, our situations will change.
Sensei AJ’s point? We can enjoy the sweetness of a karate class together over Zoom while we wait for that change.
This morning, Senseis R, T, along with Senpai Angel and I met in Griffith Park for Senpai MP’s brown belt test. I parked at the wrong lot, attempted to walk to the location, only to realize driving work better. By the time I arrived, Senpai MP’s test had started.
Who’s got your back? Angel of Strength
I should mention that Senpai Angel, who holds a shodan, is disabled. He has severe autism, and, according to his parents, his mind is more like that of a twelve year old, though his body is that of a tall young man nearly twenty. After training with Sensei R at the dojo in Burbank for many years, he performed a modified shodan test, which he passed. He was Sensei R’s first student with severe disabilities, but not his last.
Senpai Angel opened that door for many of us, giving us a glimpse into the world of persons with differing mental and physical abilities, forcing us each to consider our own abilities and deficiencies. He had many obstacles to overcome to achieve his rank, and his accomplishments were an inspiration to us all. His continued dedication to the martial arts, as well as his friendship and kindness, continues to inspire our martial arts club.
Senpai MP’s help was vital to Senpai Angel’s own shodan, so it was only fitting that Angel would be there for MP, to call kata for him. In fact, Angel’s presence was a wonderful testament to Senpai MP’s own accomplishments. MP had tutored Angel on countless occasions, gave him rides to the dojo, checked up on him, encouraged him and corrected him. He stayed in touch with Angel during the pandemic.
Strength of Character
Of all the strength, skill and prowess demonstrated by Senpai MP today, perhaps his greatest accomplishment was this: his remarkable strength of character. He demonstrated this through his coaching of Senpai Angel. Senpai Angel’s own accomplishments and improvements were in no small part due to Senpai MP’s gentle encouragement and dedication.
And let me give you a brief description of Senpai MP, just to put all of this in perspective: over six feet tall, he towers over most. He’s solid muscle. His calves probably weigh more than me (granted, I’m a feather-weight.) Yesterday, Sensei R told us a story. While MP was doing his breaks–boards, mind you–he broke the cinderblock intended to help steady his boards. Senpai MP was our dojo’s primary tournament fighter for a good stretch of time.
So yeah, he’s a very strong guy.
His strength of character, however, rivals his considerable muscular power. He has an equally big heart. His dedication to both Senpai Angel and Sensei R showed this today. While he does put significant time and work into training his body, he puts equal time into his mind and soul. Through his interactions with his senseis and senpais, he displayed his still in this area, too.
Testing and Overcoming Weaknesses, Facing Fear
Sensei R has told us that every kyu rank constitutes a personal test. During the test, Sensei R will try to get into the students’ heads, make them nervous and uncertain. This is to force them to face and overcome those insecurities.
Senpai MP made his share of mistakes, but he persevered. Even when he seemed a bit rattled by corrections, he pulled himself together and kept going. He had clearly studied and practiced his kata. His foot positions were beautiful and several of his kicks demonstrated power and skill. He forgot a couple kiais. Senpai Angel noticed a move he forgot and called it out. Sensei R had him redo a couple of his kata. MP simply complied, with focused, improved technique.
Killer tabata
What was his weakness? Tabata! Few persons could best Senpai MP in a fight. This test was perhaps more difficult than one he might have faced in a dojo. In an actual kumite round in a dojo, he could deliver a powerful punch or kick to his opponent, and win a moment to catch his breath. Not so during this test.
Given the pandemic conditions, Sensei R had him do several rounds of tabata, an intensive cardio workout. He performed a two minute round of tabata representing each fight. You are not allowed to stop and catch your breath during bear-crawls, mountain-climbers or birpees. You are allowed to stop between rounds, for thirty seconds or so, then you have to be ready to go right back at it.
In Senpai MP’s case, the Senseis and Senpai Angel delivered some blows while he performed bear-crawls. He was not allowed to flatten any opponent with a powerful punch or kick; he did not stop and catch his breath, unless Sensei R or N allowed for it. At one point, he did become white and Sensei R allowed him to stop, but just long enough for his color to return.
Why do you train? What does your kata mean?
At one point, to encourage Senpai MP during his kata walk, Sensei R said, “Why do we do kata? Each kata can be a battle, and the moves are your responses to a conflict at work.” Suddenly MP’s kata moves became much more pronounced, full of power and precision. Sense R continued, “Kata can be a meditation, an expression of your religion. It can represent your joy in life. What is it for you now?” For the next kata, MP’s moves flowed more gracefully. It was a wonder to just watch the influence of his words.
Once his test was over, Senpai MP thanked each of us. He said something interesting to me. I’ll do my best to paraphrase. “I realized I had previously kept my personal training and my karate separate. I know that makes no sense. Now, that I’ve gotten older, and I can’t train every day, but every other day, I find myself practicing a kata on those days.” In short, he now integrates karate into his every day life.
Sensei AJ led Saturday’s morning karate class. She is our guest instructor with expertise in Hapkido. She has also trained in two other martial artist styles, in addition to her knowledge of our style.
Sensei AJ led Saturday’s morning karate class. She is our guest instructor with expertise in Hapkido. She has also trained in two other martial artist styles, in addition to her knowledge of our style. It’s always a treat when she joins us!
Saturday, she started us out with stretches based on using the short stick. She demonstrated using the stick to deepen arm, back and shoulder stretches. You hold the stick behind you with both hands. Then, you use it to pull the left arm with the right, and vise versa. We also held the stick out in front, with both hands, and used twisting motions with one hand, which the other resisted, in order to strengthen the forearms and wrists.
After we’d warmed up a bit with stretches and simple exercises, she taught us basic short-sword strikes using Korean short sticks, if we had them, or whatever household implement we had chosen for Zoom class. (Students in previous classes had used PVC pipes, spatulas, etc. A few of us had sticks; Sensei AJ carves these sticks, and offered to make these for students who may want their own.)
Hand Placement and How Many Hands
First, she talked to us about hand placement: longer swords or sticks may require you to use both hands to feel like you are in control of the weapon. Shorter and lighter-weight ones may only require one hand. If you do need both hands, you place your non-dominant hand at the bottom of the weapon, and place your dominant hand further up so you may guide it better.
Most of us used two hands for our implements. She had us begin by holding the weapon behind our backs, as if we had a sheathed sword with its holder strapped to our backs. We pulled the weapon from behind, raised it overhead with two hands, then brought it down in front, along our own center-lines. Here’s the idea: the sword is in a “sheath” fastened to your back. As F remembers it, warriors on horseback would have worn swords in this fashion.
Simple Strikes and Blocks
In the video below, Gerard Lopez, an Aikido instructor, explains how a bokken is held. Sensei AJ gave us similar instructions, though hers were intended for various weapons:
Sensei AJ had us perform similar strikes downwards with our sticks. Like Mr. Lopez, she also told us to treat the stick as an extension of our bodies. I love his explanation, however, of
Drawing on lessons she’d had with Sensei LR, our fencing teacher when the dojo was open, she pointed out that you can also turn sideways when wielding a sword, hence providing your opponent with less area for targeting.
Sensei AJ had us practice a series of three strikes: first a downward slice, a front jab, and a side-swipe. We did these moving forward and backwards. She also covered blocks for each of these strikes, and we practiced those as well.
Finally, she taught a little turn-flourish, that each of my children could do, but not me. Students did a kind of flower with the stick over their heads as they turned 360 degrees. It was certainly fun to watch, but not so easy to do!
Extras
Here are a couple more fun videos that I found while researching bokken and katana, in an attempt to remember what we learned on Saturday.
These folks are so skilled, they’re a joy to watch!
And finally, for Samurai Moms:
and Samurai Dads:
Both of these modern weapons masters have beautiful moves.
I missed posting last week. Over last weekend, I did start a draft for a longer post on how my karate practice has helped me with my professional life in visual effects. However, it got lengthy, is incomplete, and also needs revisions. I hope to complete it, get a friend’s eyes on it, and eventually get it up.
For now, though, I want to write about what our karate club studied this past week, and bring this blog up to date. What did we do? We reviewed the basics!
Using Basic Kata to Improve Technique
Often we have Sensei R. on Tuesday evenings, but this past week, we did not have him. The Club did not raise as much as we needed in January. We did have an angel donor who put in more than usual, and Sensei R. also taught a week pro bono. However, we want to pay for his services, and not take advantage of his kindness. This month we planned to have him teach less. Also, he is focused on a performance: his one-man show, and we want to give him space for this.
Senpai N. covered Tuesday evening. After running kihon, she asked folks which kata they needed to review, and one of our green belts requested Pinan Sono Go. It had been a while since we’d run it, so it was great to review. Senpai N. ran through it, attempted to answer questions, and Sensei T. covered some of the finer points.
Mix it Up with Weapons
Likewise Friday evening, Senpai SL, our resident weapons expert, used simple combinations, followed by basic kata, for his katana class. First he had students name simple katana moves that they remembered, such as a basic downward slash, or an upper-cut. He chose 3 attacks and had us perform these as a combination while stepping forward or stepping backwards. Then he chose 3 blocks with the katana, created a similar combination, and has us practice until we got that down. Finally, towards the end of class, we substituted the katana attacks for punches and the katana blocks for blocks in Pinan Sono Ichi. It was a lot of fun and a great way to review and use a basic kata.
Focus on Clean, Clear Moves and Hone Techniques
On Saturday, Senpai CF, one of our youngest junior shodans, led class. After asking one of our green belts to lead the warm-up, he had several students lead kihon and led parts himself. Afterwards, he went over Pinan Sono Ni. It had been so long since we had practiced that kata! I personally benefitted from reviewing it, and the class did as well. Senpai F., monitor that morning, noted we all needed to work on our hikite hand. Also, blocks performed in kata are normally two-handed. I realized I needed to focus on clearly articulating both hands during my blocks for Pinan Sono Ni.
Sensei T. reviewed some of the bunkai associated with Pinan Sono Ni. Sensei. R had recommended and excellent book on bunkai for the Pinans: Steven Chriscole’s Okinawan Shuri-te. Here is his ad for his book:
In the book, Mr. Chriscole talks about how many of the Pinans were focused on techniques used when facing basically weapons based on 19th Century technology: rifles with bayonets, as well as sabres, katana or knives. Sensei T. touched on how some of the techniques are codes for techniques to basically wrestle a weapon from an opponent, then deliver an attack.
The book refers to the Hinans, which is the Shotokan name for what we, in Kyokushin, refer to as the Pinans. However, our karate, and our Pinans, grew out of Shotokan. Our founder, Oyama, studied Shotokan for two years in Gichin Funakoshi‘s dojo.
Always More There than Meets the Eye
Reviewing the basics is a great way to clean up your technique. Sensei R. would often have us run all of the Pinans, reminding us to step before punching, to improve balance and give more power to our punches, focus on two-handed techniques for blocks, and remember our hikite hands while punching. For kicking, we make sure our foot position is proper, and try to kick higher and faster. Sensei M, while practicing both the kin-geri and ashiro-geri kicks, encouraged us to pull back our striking foot faster than we put it out.
Reviewing the basics is a great way to improve your karate practice.
Oyama, the founder of our style, made several references to the importance of courtesy in his writings. I am sure, given what I’ve read of his writings and based on stories heard from Senseis, that he emphasized courtesy to his students.
Our small karate club strives to follow his example in preserving courtesy and etiquette in our karate practice.
Wear Your Dogi and Obi to Class!
This has not changed for our small club, even after we’ve moved our teaching format to Zoom. The temptation over Zoom is to become less formal. At work or school, we can easily remain in our pajamas, since the lower half of our bodies is usually not visible from camera. This informality is so widespread during the pandemic that the local papers and Twitter posts abound with jokes on the subject.
During karate class, we have students working in limited spaces, where only part of their bodies are visible. Despite this, we ask students and instructors to wear gis. During the fall and winter months, even in Los Angeles where winter might just constitute two weeks of rain in January, students wear full gis. During the summer, by contrast, during a beach to work out, students can wear a dojo t-shirt or a plain navy t-shirt. Over Zoom, students are on their honor to wear full gis.
Over Zoom, we make an exception for the monitor. Since monitors cannot practically participate in class and adequately perform their duties, the club allows monitors to wear street clothes. It’s the one perk of being the monitor.
Why wear a gi for a class over Zoom?
Donning a gi for class helps put you in the correct frame of mind for karate. When I put on my gi, I represent my rank: my behavior needs to be appropriate for that rank. As a shodan, ichi kyu or any high-ranking senpai, you are expected to set an example for your kohais. This starts with appropriate attire. For high rank, your gi should be clean and neat. It may be worn or stained from years of practice, but it should not look like it sat in the corner of your closet for a week. Part of caring about our karate is caring for our karate uniforms. Junior students watch more senior ones for behavior queues, so senpais need to set a proper example. That example setting starts with the basics: wearing a gi.
If you discover your gi has come open or your need to straighten your gi during class, we have a procedure to follow for this. Within the dojo, training outdoors or over Zoom, it is customary to give a quick “Osu,” bow and then turn. You then turn away from the instructor and other students to make adjustments. Over Zoom, turn your back to your camera. Often, during a vigorous kihon, a sensei or senpai will call out “Turn around and fix your gi!” Take that opportunity to tidy your appearance: tuck your gi back under your belt and make sure your belt is knotted properly.
Line-up and Meditation
Facing Shomen
Classes start with a call to “line-up.” In a physical dojo or in a park, we would face Shomen, and organize ourselves into a line, with the highest ranking person standing to the left and the lowest ranking person on the right.
The dojo’s sensei or the highest ranking sensei stands before the line of students. In our old dojo, our Shomen was a large Kanku mounted on the wall above the large mirror. On the beach, we acknowledge the ocean as our Shomen. In a park, Sensei R. would often choose a large tree, and sometimes he’d pick an animal or a person to be the Shomen. Occasionally, with humor, Sensei R named a parent or a late-arriving student as the Shomen.
What is a Shomen?
Traditionally, in most karate styles, the Shomen is a wall within the dojo, considered the “front” of the dojo, without a door. I like Kyoshin Ryu Academy’s explanation:
“… the shomen is the proper side of the dojo and a place of respect…. there is always a focal point. This is the shomen.”
In most dojos, you will find photos of a style’s founder, a photo of the head teacher’s instructor, along with other symbols in this area of the dojo. Bowing to the shomen acknowledges and shows respect to our teachers’ teachers, as well as to karate’s long history.
Sensei R., who also has roots in Native American traditions, taught that the Shomen represents the sacred. Yes, we view karate teachers who came before us and karate’s great history as sacred. Also, we view natural phenomena, like the ocean, a great old tree or or even other creatures, as sacred. They, like our founder Oyama, have the potential to teach us, as long as we have the ability to listen to and see them.
What is Rank? How to line up by rank over Zoom
Over Zoom, lining up by rank means standing in yoi, or the “ready” position, with your camera on. Even though we cannot make a physical line by rank over Zoom, we can still stand at a proper distance from our cameras, showing as much of our bodies as we can in our limited space, be still, focus on the instructor and wait for class to start. Students stand with their hands in fists, straight to their sides, or resting on their belts. The instructor and monitor will notice when students are ready.
Though we cannot stand in order of rank, rank is still important. Lower ranking students are given less responsibilities and are expected to follow along during class as best as they can. They are allowed to pose questions at appropriate times, but not interrupt class with questions. Good instructors, however, will pause class to access student understanding and ask if there are questions, giving students an appropriate time to speak up.
My oldest often says to me, “Own your rank!” reminding me to speak and behave with authority fitting my rank. She reminds me that, as shodans, we must lead by example. That example includes offering encouragement and forth right correction to kyu rank students. This can be particularly important over Zoom, when instructors and students do not see you smiling or nodding from your little Zoom window. You have to speak up at appropriate times, according to your role and rank during class.
Maturity as Part of Rank
Age and maturity are also factors in rank. In Sensei R’s dojo, he distinguished between “adult” ranks and “junior” ranks. We also had kyokushin kid ranks, whose belts differed from that of the older ranks by having a white stripe run through the colored belt. Each of these ranks, adult, junior and kid, had different requirements. In this fashion, Sensei R took both life experience as well as the developing coordination, emotional and mental abilities into account.
An advanced kyoku kid would take on a colored junior belt, skipping the white belt rank. This would take place when Sensei R felt the child was mature enough to attend a junior class, normally around age seven or eight. Prior to this, a kyoku kid might advance up to a brown and white striped belt. When younger children moved from a kyoku kid rank to a junior rank, they often start at orange, or ju kyu, the most junior rank of color.
Junior ranks moving to adult ranks, however, often depended upon the age and skill level of the student. A junior shodan is considered the equivalent of an adult ichi kyu, or brown stripe. However, younger junior shodans earn silver stripes on their black belts, rather than moving to the adult rank, until they are between fourteen and sixteen years of age. At that point, they are asked to retire their junior shodan belts in favor of an adult ichi kyu.
Balancing skill versus maturity
In the dojo, depending on the class, Sensei would have adult ranks line up ahead of junior ranks. Junior shodans, however, would line up behind adult ichi kyus. Junior shodans, after all, had performed rigorous tests similar to that of adults and thus earned their position in the line-up ahead of adults with intermediate or beginning ranks. That said, karate still dictates that one show courtesy to one’s elders, regardless of skill level. It’s a balancing act for the junior shodans: be polite to the adults, but still teach and offer correction when necessary to do so. In the dojo, students could take their queues from Sensei R, or the Nidan Sensais and Senpais. Over Zoom, that process is a bit more tricky. However, our students, taught to be courteous, have learned to offer advice and correction in a kind manner to all.
Meditations: Mokusou
We begin each class with a standing or sitting meditation, and we end each class in a similar fashion. After students have lined up, the instructor will call out “Mokusou,” which is a signal for students to start meditation. We clear our minds and typically count three breaths. Instructors may choose to shorten or lengthen the meditation period as they see fit. Likewise, at the end of a good work-out, the instructor will ask students to breathe with him or her. We normally end by bowing to the shomen, our Senseis, our Senpais and then our fellow students. When the instructor calls out, “Otagai ni rei,” i.e, bow in appreciation to your fellow students, class is dismissed.
Bowing to show respect and consideration
Note that bows are performed to all. We start by bowing to the shomen, that which represents the knowledge and consideration of those before us, who brought us karate. The shomen also represents what we each may consider sacred. We then bow to our teachers, according to rank, and end with bowing to each other. Like Sensei R. naming a student the shomen who had wandered into the park work-out late, we acknowledge that our fellow students and human beings are deserving of our kindest regard and respect. Our time together during training, as well as our time together on this earth, is sacred. We should treat it as such.
Ultimately, the rules of etiquette that we follow in karate give us ways of showing courtesy to our teachers and to each other. This includes the teachers who came long before us, who created karate, as well as our elders and fellow students. We don our gis to show respect to the karate community that we train with. Lining up by rank and age acknowledges the hard work, effort and life experiences of others. It also allows us to enjoy regard when we have worked hard to achieve a rank. This, in turn, teaches us to respect ourselves as well as others.
I’ll end with a final quote from our style’s founder regarding courtesy.
“Courtesy should be apparent in all our actions and words and in all aspects of daily life. But be courtesy, I do not mean rigid, cold formality. Courtesy in the truest sense is selfless concern for the welfare and physical and mental comfort of the other person.”